Greeting a dog, the do’s and don’ts or what the heck is wrong with people?

Last week Freighter attended a large local dog show.  A lot of the general public also attended.  All dog shows are open to the general public with some better attended than others.  This show does a lot of advertising and has a lot of exhibitions besides the show.  It is in an urban area so it pulls a higher attendance than shows out at a fairground in a rural area.  In addition, the show invites the general public to bring their dogs and try things like agility and obedience which means that there are dogs not entered in the show in attendance.

You see where I am going with this?

I understand what the club putting on the show and the AKC are trying to do.  Between animal rights groups and rescue group demonizing the purebred dog, the more people who can come out and see what a show is all about and meet the dogs participating the better.  The more people who become involved with AKC activities like agility, obedience, rally, coursing, that are open to purebred and mixed breed dogs the better.   I get it.

For the most part, people who brought their dogs made sure they were well behaved which is an improvement from last year.  The problem this year was with the people who came up to greet Freighter.

What The Heck Is Wrong With People?

On Saturday Freighter met many people who came up and asked to pet him.  Who could resist a face like this?

Chesapeake Bay Retriever
Freighter Just Has The Kind Of Face People That Draws People Over

On Saturday people approached him in a respectful manner.  They asked if they could pet him and spoke nicely to him and petted him in a nice way.  He loves the attention and meeting people.

Sunday was a whole different story.  I cannot tell you how many people came up to Freighter and just started grabbing at him.

A young boy came up and asked to pet him and hubby said of course.  All of a sudden another boy came sliding in on his knees and grabbed him around the neck to pull Freighter toward him. He came in such a way that hubby never even saw him coming. Hubby immediately put a stop to that.  Freighter was tolerant, but that is a good way to get bit.  Maybe the kid had no idea how to greet a dog but surely a parent was watching their child, but they were nowhere around.

Then a young woman (yes an adult) crossed a busy aisle full of people to come up behind Freighter and grab at his rump.  I have no idea why she did that, maybe she wanted to feel his wavy coat?  Freighter was standing at heel next to hubby waiting for his turn in the ring so again, we never even saw the woman coming.  More importantly, Freighter never saw her coming.  It definitely startled him but he did not over react.  The woman was lucky.  As soon as I saw the hand grabbing at him I said “Do not do that.  Never grab at a strange dog that way.”  I was a bit late, but at least there was no second grab.

Chesapeake Bay Retriever Dog Show
Lucky For The Grabby Woman Freighter Is Used To Hubby Checking His Coat

These were not the only two people who came up grabbing at Freighter without asking, so after the experience with the woman, hubby moved Freighter into an area designated for handlers and their dogs only.  People still tried to come up to him, but the was a club member there who was monitoring people entering the area.

It is not that Freighter reacted to any of the people who were rude to him, but we are well aware that a dog show can be a stressful place for the dogs.  There is a lot of noise and a lot of people around.  For our dogs who are shown only occasionally, a show is not their normal routine.  By Sunday, the dog is usually tired and a bit cranky.  I understand that it is a good opportunity to educate people about how to greet a dog, but as responsible owners we are not going to put our dogs in a bad situation so we elected to remove him from it.

Here is my list of some things to do and not to do when greeting a strange dog.

Greeting A Dog: Do’s And Don’ts

Greeting A Dog
Greeting A Dog: Do’s And Don’ts
  • Do ask if you can pet the dog.
  • Do speak in a happy voice to the dog.
  • Do observe the dog to see if it is interested in greeting you.
  • Do let the dog sniff the back of your closed hand.
  • Do keep observing the dog to make sure it still wants to meet you.
  • Do pet the dog’s head (provided the dog is receptive to that, not all are) or shoulder, neck or chest.
  • Do ask where the dog prefers to be petted if you are unsure.
  • Don’t pet the dog without asking first.
  • Don’t sneak up on the dog.
  • Don’t rush up to the dog.
  • Don’t grab at the dog, especially the rear end.
  • Don’t stare at the dog.
  • Don’t crouch over the dog or get down and try to pull the dog on your lap.

I tried to keep the list short and easy to remember because I think if you follow these tips, you are more likely to have a successful greeting with a strange dog.

Do you have any Do’s and Don’ts to add?

22 thoughts on “Greeting A Dog – Do’s And Don’ts

  1. Great post Linda! I’d like to know where the boy’s parents were! And that young woman?! Geezloweeze! I wonder what she would do if some stranger grabbed HER butt!!

    The only greeting “do” that I would alter would be the one about letting the dog “sniff the back of your closed hand”. I prefer to let the dog sniff at the palm of my open hand so they don’t try to get to a treat they might think I’m holding in my closed hand, and possibly nip me in the process. To each his/her own I guess.

    1. Some dogs object to an open hand. I think as long as the dog looks accepting, whatever works is fine.

  2. I agree with you… such moments like that with the two boys are scary for me… and it sometimes ends with headlines in the news and the dog has to pay for that…
    A show needs visitors and a lot of people bring kids who like to see dogs and who want to pet them… I understand… but to bring kids who play soccer between the rings and kick the dogs away with the ball are the last thing I can tolerate…. their parents ate sausages and gave a fart on the behavior of their kids… they only acted (with rude comments) as a helper seized the ball and sent them to a meadow to play…
    btw: I would love to touch a brown dawg too, but I would ask the owner first, of course… I never saw a chessie for real… crazy huh?

    1. Wow now that is a story. Tops mine. Maybe some day you will see a Chessie in France. There are quite a few in England. Maybe a trip in order. 🙂

  3. This is a most important post and it is also a pet peeve of mine, since Dakota is friendly with those he KNOWS, but often people/kids approach him in the wrong way. For kids, we reviewed a book ages ago that deals with this http://dakotasden.net/2011/06/06/book-review-dont-lick-the-dog-making-friends-with-dogs-by-wendy-wahman/

    Here is another post we did about the same topic: http://dakotasden.net/2015/05/18/petsafe-joins-the-family-dog-for-educational-campaign-to-keep-kids-safe-around-familiar-dogs-stopthe77/

  4. Fantastic post! I would add Don’t allow your dog off leash to greet strange dogs when you’re not in a dog park. This has happened to me so often that I’m hesitant to take my dogs on walks.

    1. Luckily that is not an issue at a dog show since dogs are on a short lead at all times except those competing in agility/obedience/dock diving, etc. Those dogs are trained.

  5. We are always surprised at how many people get right up into Katie’s face. She is pretty tolerant of people, but most Kuvasz would not be. Since we are short it doesn’t happen to us as much, but people still grab at our furs.

    1. I think it is also a lack of manners. When we used to do the Cobo dog show years ago, people were much better about greeting the dogs.

  6. That is ridiculous behaviour. I’ve definitely gotten some surly looks from indifferent parents when I educate their kids on how to approach dogs. Gwynn is pretty nervous of kids, so I keep a sharp eye out. And the number of toddlers whose parents let them run screaming towards a strange dog is mind-boggling. On the plus side, my ‘seriously, listen to me, dog’ voice works on kids when i tell them to STOP. For me, it’s 3 rules (2 if you’re an adult) – ask your parent, ask the dog owner, ask the dog. If Gwynn seems amenable, I’ll say yes, but then it’s letting him go up to the person instead of the person crowding close to me so that Gwynn doesn’t have an escape route. And if he’s not comfortable with a kid, i’ll get him to do his ‘wave’ trick at them instead, which children seem to enjoy.

  7. Great guidelines and thoughtful responses. I always appreciated when the scout troops brought kids to DKC, they were given pre-show instruction about approaching dogs. I guess the one area that absolutely sets me off, is people/children approaching a crated dog and sticking their hand towards or onto, into the kennel! Makes you wonder? Approaching a strange dog can be hazardous if done without manners!
    Sun is out and the Cjessies are observing nature
    Speaking of France, our Coco was named for C. Chanel, because she wore this lovey dark brown Chessie suit!

  8. It’s amazing how little some people really understand about dogs! And no wonder when dog bites happen. I haven’t had a lot of bad experiences…but we also don’t go to many big events like that. It is always impressive to me to run into kids on walks and to have them ask politely if they can pet my dog. Sheba actually gets miffed when people walk by and don’t want to give her attention! 🙂 But she is the only one of my dogs that is like that.
    This is really great information and I hope a lot of people see it.

  9. Oh my gosh, this is a fantastic post! My biggest pet peeve is all those parents out there that don’t care how their young kids greet a dog. We’ve had so many problems with that, including one boy that yelled and hit Haley with a stick as we passed him on a hike.

    So many of these parents are clueless about the danger they put their kids in. I get so aggravated when I’m put in the position of having to physically block an aggressive acting toddler trying to get to Haley. The parents are always 30 feet behind them yelling “It’s okay, he (or she) loves dogs!”

    Sorry, rant over! 🙂

  10. Great post and to be honest, one of the reasons I don’t take Jack into public areas too often. You never know what stupid thing people are going to do and Jack, while usually sweet and tolerant gets stressed with a lot of people and who knows…

  11. Great post! That’s one of the things that happens quite often when taking the guys on their therapy visits, some of the people can be “over enthusiastic” in their greetings.

  12. Good God, so annoying, I can’t stand people (adults/kids) who just come up (or run up!) to my pups and start grabbing at them. I’ve had to ask so many people to please ask for permission first before touching them. Once they do ask, I always suggest petting their chest or sides, but never their heads. They do not like that at all, especially not from strangers.

  13. People and kids around dogs they don’t know…it is frustrating to educate sometimes.

    I would only add (and I think this is common sense) not to tease the dog. We had that happen at a bus stop. There was one kid there who was interested in meeting the dogs. Sampson walked up to him and then the kid jumped backwards away from Sampson. I said, “Don’t tease my dog like that” and removed Sampson from the situation. IMO that’s another good way to get bit. 🙁

  14. With the Newfs I try to get them in as many situations as possible, petstore, training, walking in neighborhood. With their size they always draw a lot of attention. They are all very friendly and Mica being a show dog has been handled everywhere. However, running screaming kids make her nervous. If she sees one coming she will step back or step behind me. There was one man in our home walks that I don’t believe had a clue. He allowed his dog to approach Mica from behind to attack, Mica spun around knocked the dog down and laid on him. No one was hurt however the man was furious with John and Mica!?

Comments are closed.